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Quite the Journey Together
A week less than 9 months ago, my good friend and her husband sat with me on my guest bedroom floor. They had just flown in from Minnesota for a visit, and we were catching up. At one point, my...
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Mothers Day is great … for Mothers
It’s weird to be here. Where is here? Mothers Day. I’m a mother–on Mothers Day. Last year, I was not a mother on Mothers Day, and that made me quite sad. And angry. And bitter. It was not a good day,...
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TED talk: Glad I watched
Three weeks ago, my pastor sent me a link to a TED talk, saying that I might be interested. Today I finally took the time to watch it. He had said he was hooked by 8 minutes in. At two minutes in, I...
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The Luxury of an Oops
Ever since I miscarried last week, I’ve had this phrase rolling through my mind: Luxury of an Oops It has occurred to me that having an “oops” pregnancy, while unexpected and kinda stressful, is...
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I Don’t Want to Want It
“I just really don’t want to want it again, until I get it, and then I want to want it fully. Make sense?” I muttered this to my husband as we both attempted to drift to sleep, each battling our own...
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Trusting in the Midst of Grief
These past two weeks have been a roller coaster. We found out we were pregnant on January 5, much to our surprise considering our history of struggling to conceive. And thus we began the wonderful...
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Oh How Life Has Changed
Mother’s Day in 2009 … I purposefully scheduled a weekend getaway so as to not have to be at church. (Granted, I mixed up my dates, and we actually had our getaway the weekend before Mother’s Day, so I...
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25 Weeks: The Gift of Infertility
There I was, kissing my two year old angel goodbye, and struggling to climb semi gracefully out of the car. At 25 weeks pregnant, “graceful” is quickly becoming a thing of the past. I balanced a...
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Things I’ll Miss
In an attempt to remind myself that this pregnancy really is nearing its end (whether I believe that truth right now or not), I’m going to try to list all the things I’ll miss about being pregnant....
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Mother’s Day: Here It Is Again
Mother’s Day used to hurt my heart. Over three years and two kids later … it still kinda does. Mother’s Day hurts my heart because I remember. I remember how it felt to wake up on that dreadful...
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I’ve Been Half-Lying
“God is sovereign!” We’ve all said it. Complain, complain, critique, question, complain … “But it’s all good–God is sovereign!” I’m know I’m guilty of it. Saying that TRUTH but not wholeheartedly...
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Marked with Infertility
Bear with me, it has been a while. My Trying to Conceive history: Easy conception in December of 2006 and then a 10 week “missed” miscarriage. D&C. Doctor discovered a septate in my uterus. Nurse...
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Dealing With Loss
kristinlindeen:My husband’s heart echoes my own …. Originally posted on Erik Lindeen: Last week, my wife and I experienced the pain and loss of our fourth miscarriage. To be honest, I’m still coming to...
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Now I Understand the “Oops”
For years, as a woman who struggled to successfully conceive a child, I struggled mightily with “The Oops.” I just didn’t understand how someone could have an oops, cry over an oops, be shocked by the...
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